Self-Giving Laughter

The itch to create a blog hovered in me for quite some time. I guess it took a little extra peace and quiet sweeping over my house and soul before I could get the courage to start one. And that is really what I needed…courage. Because, quite honestly, the only thing holding me back from starting a blog was fear.
Fear of "failure" (how can one really fail when writing a blog?). Fear of embarrassment. Fear of public perception (and no, I don't feel like I am an expert on anything worth reading besides trying to love the life I lead).
But the little idea to start a blog hasn't left my system for the last couple of years (yes, the fact that I had the desire for a couple of years and just now started is telling of how much fear can have a grip on me).
So, I begin. Because if anyone knows me well, they know I have a knack for being open. For letting people into my mess and encouraging them to do the same. I'm not afraid to let people into my brokenness (letting the whole internet world into my life somehow feels different, but we are trying to shake that off). I believe sharing our messy lives with others cultivates true community. And every fiber in my being seeks that. Does yours?

Do you also crave the safety that comes from sharing messy lives with others and still being loved? Unconditional love and grace. I know what it feels like to be given grace so I want to live a life that freely extends it.
Like the time I snapped at my husband to "hurry up and go cook the bacon" for the Saturday morning work meeting I hosted and for which I promised breakfast and for which I was the reason why the cooking time was delayed to begin with and for which he proceeded to cook a delicious breakfast for us without complaining (ya….that happened this morning. see what i mean about messy).
Or you know, like the everyday experiences where I mess up and remember how good God is to provide Jesus as a sacrifice for our sins- small things like that ;).
I write to share my messy life with you. To create community. To express my life journey to honor God through grace and hospitality. To nurture a creative outlet.
Grant laughed at me when I told him I wanted to start a blog ("why are you laughing at me?". "i'm not laughing at you. i just don't understand blogs." well, me either.). But I think there might be something to his response. If I can have his attitude while I take this journey, then I think it will work out just fine and hopefully include some self-giving laughter.